im all dead on the inside

this is killing me... im about to cry, but i cant because my parents are in the same room as me.
but the good thing is that im about to go bed now and i will be able to cry in the shower..... O.o

this video just made me really sa. i mean i know that im supposed to be happy for these two amazing people that are in love, but i just cant help it.

and also the fact that they are these two extremely beautiful and sucessful people, star in the best movies..... but here i am siting at home, where no one beleives in me and obviously i know that i have a talent..... but fucking school work doesnt leave me with enough time to apply for an agency.. HENCE IM NOT IN A SINGLE MOVIE YET!!!!!!!!! AND IM GOING TO BE 15 IN JUNE!!!

BUT I PRAY THAT WELL BEFORE THE 15TH OF JUNE 2011 I WILL BE CAST/ AND ALREADY FILMING IN MY FIRST ROLE.

NOW I DONT GIVE A SHIT WHAT TYPE OF A ROLE IT IS. I CAN HAVE JUST 1 LINE OR 15 LINES OR THEY MIGHT JUST SHW MY FACE AS AN EXTRA!!!! BUT I SWEAR THAT I FUCKING WILL BE AN ACTRESS BEFORE MY 15TH BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!


OH.... here is the video that i was crying over....

battle of the bands.01/20/2011

there is a 'battle of the bands' competition at my school tomorrow. and i told my my mom about it, thinking that her and my dad might come. but she made me "invite" my sister, even though i DIDN'T and still DONT want her there. So i told her, and she said 'yes' and then 10 minutes later she tells me that she invited her fucking friend, WITHOUT EVEN ASKING ME!!!! Its my school, Im a student there, and Im not even sure how the BOBands is going to be like because its my first time to attend something like that :@ *im so mad* and then my mom had a pitty talk about my sister with me and then she started crying saying that she doesnt have a lot of friends - my sister(almost 20y.o.)-  and this and that... and YaDa YaDa Ya!!!!

Nerd....

I got an A1* for my biology essay.... im such a nerd :P

not that i mind :D

I feel so fucking smug

My dad came back from the parent-teacher evening. basically he had a 5minute conversation with everyone of my subject teachers, and they talked about ME and my improvements :D and turns out all 9 of my subject teachers said amazing stuff about me.. and no, im not being bias :P so my ego is altered :D

I was especially happy with the 'reviews' from my Drama teacher and my Biology teacher:D as well as my english teacher who noted that i read a lot :P... which I do, Im a nerd... not really, but in a way

So Im feeling very smug and proud of myself now :D

Fuck yeah, Bella xoxo

The Golden Globe Award

As u can see this is a picture of our lovely Robert Pattinson, Im guessing at this very moment during his rehearsal for the awards tonight. As we all know he will be one of the presenters tonight.

Unfortunately I wont be able to watch it cuz Ive got school tomorrow, and even if i didnt have school tomorrow I still wouldnt be able to watch, because I dont have Sky Movie Premier Channel :((( 

*Crying*.. not really

I dont have any followers :(((

Tom Felton

My new obsesssion...BUT only when he has his hair bleached. I dunno why but I like him  only with bleach blonde hair. and I personally think that he should dye it in real life :D he looks way too cute <3